misrep:

-fraudulent

-negligence

-innocence

out of these three, i love to explain the last one --innocence

cos it's simple to explain

i just nid two words "just blur" HAHAH (Y) rite !

i rmb explaining this chap of bus law to cheryl and when i explain innocence ,

paperfish pointed her fingers at me , saying "ya . just blur like her" HAHAH

haix . one more day :(

it's getting so confusing now .

i think i shld just forget abt it

sometimes, treating someone nice isn't equivalent to the monetary rewards that u're giving her .

u can be deemed as ill-treating someone even if u r giving her rewards at the same time unless im talking abt some materialistic person here .

not everyone treats maternal objects as everything and the only things in the world .

i suddenly wanna celebrate xmas :)

not rly celebrate but just to go out ..

:D

Wanted to slp at 10 pm ytd but as i shut down my comp , the tv aired "incredible tales". Intended to slp aft show ended but fren delayed my slping time for abt 50 mins x.x

why am i so lazy :(

i suddenly browsed thru the pics and miss the past .

merry xmas everyone :P

i like helping my frens .

but sometimes , i wondered if im too busybody .

cos i will auto hlp before they even request for it .

(not all the times though . i'd be oblivious to dem most of the times :/ )

Had plurkers' outing ytd :D

went to tanjong for our sakae outing .

had ard 10+ ppl gng initially but ended up only 5 of us turned up .

but we still had loads of laughter and i laughed till i cried :X

and vincent kept wanting to tk my pic ! LOL

he didnt succeed but i did ~ :P

took one pic wid tofu . in the toilet HAHHA
and pup said that this is piception . LOL

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TsPFU5KevQM

LOL ! this is ultra cute la ! i kept watching it over and over agn and finds the blue's back hook to be so cute xD

imagine me doing this during my sparring D:

im so gonna be kicked till i fly out HAHA .

The little boy is very cute rite ! HAHA

http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=singlish&oq=singlish&aq=f&aqi=g10&aql=&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=1103742l1103921l0l1104160l2l2l0l0l0l0l142l142l0.1l1l0

found these in youtube . haha

i blurted two names accidentally T.T

luckily one name is a super common one and is the same as one of the ppl out for the outing .

*phew*

i think i have said the wrong words T.T

beta to siammmmmmm D:

idk if ur that sentence is saying abt me .

but if u r , den i am v disappointed in u .

i've been doing so much and yet u still say this .

if i heven treated it seriously , i wldn't have teared so much and tried so much to salvage ..

utterly disappointed .

i got so happy seeing my close frens that i kept blabbering ..

i nid to stop talking so much .

i wonder why my shyness is back agn ..

i tend to shun away / avoid direct eye contact even when im talking to dem .

i noe it's rude but i cnt help it .

cos i think i will blush .

this happens even wid my neighbour ytd :/

i hope she dun think that im being rude :/

but that kind of feeling fade away aft awhile .

i rmb that i only have this type of reaction when i see online frens for the first time (though that's soooo long ago alr)

haix . why is this so

now i noe why my phone batt depletes so fast when im outside and not at home ...

:/

i made such a blunder today .

my fren is still in korea and i tot that he is joining us today .

i smsed him and wondered why he didnt reply .

so i smsed my another fren saying "aaron miaed :("

HAHAHAH .

omt . i only realized this blunder when i met up wid my another frens .

oops sorry :x

anw , paperfish was saying "you kept singing non stop sia . ur mouth has nvr stopped moving"

HAHAH i noe ! im this enthu when it comes to singing esp songs that i noe xD HAHAHAH .

too bad that i didnt get to sing fish leong's and angela's songs :(

天下无不散之筵席 :(

sshhhh . be quiet

questions ...

but nvm , 心静自然忘

im just one confused person ...

i dreamt that i put this into the refrigerator ._.

i have no idea why i prefer charging phone in sp than in ntu :X

!!!!

LOL

had my fillet !! so happy :D:D:D

i want my fav fillet :D

i can remember the first days i met a few ppl :)

memorable .

like i told paperfish previously , i can still rmb my first impression of love .

i used to yearn for it and think that it's like most fairy tales.

how flawless where boys and gals just like each other and be happily ever after together .

or it can even be like those romance show (which i used to be so obsessed in my sec sch life) where quarrels and misunderstandings happen and yet they still can stand strong together .

but aft experiencing it for myself ,

i felt that it isn't sth big deal anymore .

human yearn for love , it's true perhaps .

but only give it to the right person who deserve it , right ? :D

HAHAH

i may call dem experience or memories ..

but the most impt word to describe dem is "lesson"

aww man ! this is so cute :D

angry bird :D

paperfish wants to see me be tgt wid u .

lol weird , isn't it ?

but , i will still keep mum and smile if u guys continue that topic ...

at times , i felt as if im rly a bad person

though im rly okay to ppl joining my clique , i just felt weird and have a tinge hope that they dun

it's not that i dun want dem to join or me making new frens .

it's just that im afraid that my clique will become too big that i'll be so easily forgotten ...

SM: i took part in the national team !

us: waa ! nice :)

SM: and i got fourth

us: woah so pro !

SM: wait wait . dun get happy too fast . dere are only four participating teams

us: HAHAHA

actually , while i was walking that path home , i recalled certain things .

accompanied by emo songs , i almost became sad .

it's till den i told myself "no use lamenting over it . no pt since he didnt even care abt it , abt u . u shld just smile :)"

with that in mind , i rly smiled and walked happily home :)

and ya , i was just reminded of the conv wid me and paperfish .

she was like telling me that she used to not being able to control her temper .

den i told her that if ppl scold me , i will just listen unless i find it absurd or rly cnt take it den i'd say sth back . and i'd normally just forget abt it the next day.

she laughed and said "ya . i always scold u one. " HAHAH

she was like saying that jx always chided her for scolding me . HAHA .

actually , i just treat all her words as jokes . LOL !

not offended but even if i did , i'd have forgotten abt dem :X

Went out wid paperfish tdy xD we spent a total of $100+ x.x haha omt . Im rly broke alr ... ended up spending 40 mins walk home . But truth is , i dun mind accompanying her . My uni period is the first time that made me be so on . Id normally reject any last min outings and most outings even if they aint last min ones .

Amd she is v funny , she appeared to be super happy when she knew the ans . She just asked "he is not good rite?" . I was shocked cos i didnt tell her anything HAHA . I only told like less than five ppl . :x perhaps she heard that frm someone else .

lol . everyone's asking me that same question .

is that question v interesting to u guys ? LOL !

but well , if any of the parties were to block/delete the other party , i'd find it childish (unless harassment) .

hey , u guys can still be friends, isn't it ?

my fren best sia .

when i told him that im at cia , he asked me one question "you know how to get hm?"

HAHAHA . thanks ah .

now im kinda well known for losing my way

wanted to send frens back to the mrt station and they ended up sending me bak to the bus stop for fear of me losing my way T.T

HAHAHAH

i need an insurance for getting lost :x

i was "hiding" under the shade cos i noe that i'd have terrible sunburn if i were to go under the sun ..

but my face hurts now T.T

haix ... im the only one hiding under the shade

luckily i wore long pants . lol !

and now , my hands are super black :(

i had ultra bad sun burn before .

shld have applied sun block :(

i doubt there will be for the time being

if there is any , i'll curb it

it has been a few days alr . guess i need a week ?

wait . that may not be the case ...

i think i nid a shorter period than that . :)

random happy chats and outings are indeed making me feel beta

gonna reach vivo tmr at 9.50am

that's early , isn't it ?

need to go buy drinks and food tgt wid fren

managed to drag one along to help carry the stuff and my fren managed to cling to another fren of ours to help out too .

gng out tmr , wed and thu .

i want to go kbox agn !!

wed wld only be to learn driving ...

and fren just asked me out on thu ..

butbutbut , i nid to get bak to my books soon .

maybe fri or this wkend ...

before that , i'd need to finish up the storybook that i just borrowed and the vids that i've dled quite some time ago .

i need like a few days to finish watching dem T.T

dere goes my plan to sleep early !

wad do i want ???
sad to say , i've no idea abt it myself

I want to be alone but yet i dun want to be alone . Contradicting ?

im like adding more and more ppl into my "unrecoverable" and "missing" list ...

i shld stop doing dem .

how i wish i can just press the 'delete' button to remove dem

AX,

vivo csc,

couple lab,

...

...

...

...

HAHA .

i shldnt be so selfish and inconsiderate to wake nor disturb anyone up from their slp ...

and i wun do it unless ...... idk ....

i shldnt have cared abt anything

i shldnt have tried

i shld have been so sentimental

i kept recalling abt certain ppl who have left me , now and den

sometimes , i wondered how are u doing esp when my bro mentioned abt u ytd .

hope that ur hand is still fine

sadly to say , i think i shldnt msg u anymore cos u always say random things . lol ! and i dun think that i'll be gng for the outing at the end of this mth .

had kbox ytd .

it was quite fun

bro and my fren clicked :)

and they did pattern outside HAHA .

i felt so ps but luckily no one was ard dere.

been soooooo long since i last saw u .

it's a nice feeling .

that's the first time i stood up and sing .

and first time see ppl dance AND first time hear ppl sing until so loud HAHHA

speaking of "first time" , i gave my sch alot of "first time" T.T

ever since i entered this sch , it's the first time that:

i studied in sch as late as 10pm

i met up wid frens just to study

i dun mind travelling so far like to sp to revise my work

i went out wid frens for movie or enjoyment aft exams

i feared exams

i dun wanna look at my results

i cnt fall asleep at nite due to exam stress

i miss poly life soooo much !

i think that i will dabao module

i dun even think i can get C for my modules

i think that my highest grade wld be my lowest grade in poly -- c+

i think of mugging during sch hols before my sem starts

i keep gng out wid my clique

i feel a sense of belonging to my study clique

i feel so sad gng to sch

i looked alotalotalot forward to the end of exams

i kept thinking of enjoyment before the last paper

okay . i shall stop HAHA

cos i think that this list is endless .

i rly dun feel well recently .

kept dun wanna slp at nite though im so tired .

i wish that i can drink a potion to forget everything

but if dere rly is such a drink , i might not drink it

i believe that every single incident has its value or meaning

that i can learn from it and grow up .

i rly hope that u can reflect on ur own actions . pls dun bring anymore ppl into ur pool of misery . tyvm :)

i kept wanting companion recently .

that is bad ...

:)

i just realized sth ironic .

the more depressed i feel , the more easier i laugh or be crazy ....

isn't that ironic ?

i guess that it is :)

i rly dun want to leave it hanging dere .... ... though i noe that i will still feel hurt

im okay if u choose to ignore my msg last time .

but pls , dun ignore the one that i just sent .

i have the tendency to appear and talk normally wid anyone but ... ... .. .

when it's sch / exam time , i longed to have my hol !

but when my hol is here , i have nth to do .

maybe i have but i'm so bored .

maybe i will rest till sunday and mug abit aft monday hahahaa

seriously , i think gng to k is the best in making me happy !!

but too bad , dere isn't any slot ytd T.T

HAHA . else i'd be ultra happy ..

haix , who wanna go wid me ? :x lol !

i want to say it but i didnt want to initiate any chats first anymore .

but i noe that if i dun , we will be dragging this for at least 1 - 2 wks .

wad shld i be doing ?

fren kept telling me to ignore but i felt that i rly nid to say it BUT i dun wanna sms u first though . lol

initially , i tot that my hol this time round wld be chionging my driving , sch work, working and gng out .

but now , i think i'd only be chionging my sch work , gng to driving (not chionging alr cos the earlier tp is during feb :/)

idk how am i gng to get my licence in this way ..

and as for gng out , i think i'll be asking for frens to intro me volunteer work .

had been wanting to do dem but just lazy to find :x HAHA

and finally after much procrastinating (partially due to being busy in work previously), i didnt go for any :/ sighs guilty .

as for working , dere isnt a nid for it anymore .

and lastly, i dun think that anyone wants to go out wid me . so forget it HAHAHAHA okok i'm just joking .

paperfish said that nvr stop smiling cos u duno who is in love wid ur smile . but wad if i think that everyone dun like my smile ? HAHA den shall i stop smiling? :X

i noe where i stand ..

do i look so depressed to u ?

lol !

why did u tell me to cry out instead of laughing ....

hahah

i seriously dun unds why u r so childish ...

now i noe where i rly stand ..

so , stop self deceiving ...

it actually can hurt though i dun think that i can feel it anw

whenever i change my phone's ringtone , i had a hard time trying to recall the ringtone thereafter ...

cos the reason is simple .

lol

Sometimes , i rly find it tiring to love or like anyone ... ... it is like when u finally like someone , he will leave u . And when u finally think of making up ur mind , sth that ___ do will just hinder me in my decision . Who knows that i may stop liking totally one day ...
sometimes , i rly hate myself for changing my mind ... But , the reason is v simple . It is just that i became softhearted and felt that maybe i shld give it one more try . Or maybe i shld put in effort agn . Maybe that is good . Cos trying makes me give up . And giving up makes me more determined to stay on wid my decision . I rly wonder why i feel so happy seeing that sentence or a word , rather . Maybe it is cos that is the decision that has always been in my mind and yet i didnt wanna ack it . Perhaps . But truth is , i rly feel motivated now ...

Sadly , it is not a motivation to study . I still study but , i rly have this feeling that i wun even score at least a C for all my mods . So my gpa at the end of the day will b ultra cui . "Nice" job loh . Sighs .

thanks sir , u always have to affect my mood :)

yay . forget abt it :)

yeah ! i'm fine :)

like real ._.

this is so ironic ...

when i'm so in need of ppl, only my frens are here to keep my companion .

not even my bf is ard to console, encourage nor chat wid me .

worst still is , dere's not even a single msg ...

thanks so much man

rly thanks for treating me as invisible

I have sth to confess !! My mood swing is super scary recently . I go crazy and laughed tgt wid my frens but when im alone , i suddenly feel like crying though i tried real hard to curb it . At that moment , i kept thinking of u and my studies n went sad . When i see happy funny msges aft awhile later , i suddenly wanna laugh and suddenly tot of my frens and wanna laugh in the train . This is too much of a mood swing rite ??? I noe T.T wad on earth is wrong wid u ???? Omt

i cnt believe that mum's actually so petty ..

i was listening to music using ear piece and revising my work .

and she kept talking to me ...

i didnt notice that cos my music can kinda cover some bg noises ..

she got unhappy and said that i always nvr reply her ...

i rmb that i did tell her at times that i was listening to music and will most prob not be able to hear her ..

maybe i shld tell her everytime i listen to the music which wld be everyday ...

but that'd be too tiring .

that's one of the reason why i go out to study ... it's cos of this and cos hse is too comfy ..

and she's oso part of the reason to why i have to listen to music ...

why am i so useless ?

it's okay . i shall feel beta when i wk up

does ur sentence means that i'm hindering u in ur work ?

i might be ..

but if that is the case, why did u go aft me in the first place ?

and starting to talk lesser and lesser to me aft treating me so nice .

i unds that u r busy so i've nvr complained that u r busy .

nvr demand u to spend more time wid me

i tried to understand and even put myself in ur shoe to noe why ur thinking is so weird

but as usual, i'm not able to noe the reason why :)

aft trying so much , all i get was "you should understand that i was busy and tired."

it's precisely that i noe that u r busy and tired that i replied "maybe u tell them that u r busy ?" to "friend wanted to play mj after sch zz"

and once agn , wad i got was sth super not expected .

"not everything can be pushed off as and when u like"

i ignored that msg wid sth else but u came bak to argue wid me abt this thing

u said "do you know that how long i've nvr meet my friends ? i have been so busy to meet them"

i was thinking " wad ? i was just suggesting cos ur sentence sounded as if u r unwilling to meet dem" .

it was later that u told me that u were tired .

and it set me thinking agn . if u r tired , den just reject the outing .

else, just go for it and not sound so sian here ...

it's just a small case and we both tot of each other's thinking differently ...

dere is no pt arguing abt this ...

and i was shocked to see ur long long msg ...

sad to say , u only type long msg while arguing wid me

i seriously had a shock cos i didnt expect u to type such a long msg .

and when the heated conv ended, u replied wid this standard msg "you always have ur reason for ur actions. do not reply"

obviously i have my reasons for my actions rite ._.

if u put urself in my shoes, u MAY (or may not) noe that i was actually worried abt u when u said that u have mj session . cos the things that i tot were "omg . agn ? will u be more tired ? will u reach home v late agn ? u'll sure have lesser time to rest . i'd rather u to tk this time to rest and maybe meet dem nxt wk or wad since they r ur coursemate"

i nvr knew that such intention of mine wld be deemed as me trying to tell u to push off the outing .

everything's changed . i no longer have any expectation alr, i guess . or at least, not as much . i've expected for the worse . it's either i cnt tk it and pop that question or u be the one doing the 'bad guy' .

Went to sp to study tdy agn :)

so happy to have found ard 2 study buddies :D

i'm a happy gal tdy :)

was initially tired and super lethargic to study during the afternoon tdy ..

fren saw my sian face and told me to go buy coffee

i bought and instantly felt happy .

endorphin i guess xD

anw , opted for western food tdy .

fren's portion of chicken cutlet is suppppeeeerrrr HUGE . super worth the price of $3.50

highly recommended for someone who's hungry :)

i had grilled fish and added rice as my side dish . was hungry so i just ordered rice .

and i ended up not being able to finish it . HAHAH

started to "shape" the leftover and *oops* sry ! HAHAHA . i seldom play wid food :x

idk why i did that too . maybe it's cos i was too bored while waiting for fren to finish food x.x

used fren's phone to tk pic HAHAHA . idk why it's yellowish ! maybe it's cos of the light above me :x

aft that , told my another fren that i chose rice as side dish and the first thing she said was "wad !? rice ? u cnt even finish it w/o rice and u chose rice "

HAHA i cnt even rmb that i cnt finish my food la ! cos im normally able to finish it :)

anw , thanks for rmbing :D

why am i feeling so insecure ?

i kept feeling that everyone do not want to talk to me ...

:(

lol .

bravo ,cher eng

HAHA

i see this agn ! :))

"

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9966999999996999999996666996699666699666996699666996699

9966699999999999999966666699996666699666996699666996699

9966666999999999999666666669966666699666996699666996699

9966666669999999966666666669966666699666996699666996699

9966666666699996666666666669966666699666996699666996666

9966666666669966666666666669966666699999996699999996699

"

U said that i kept talking to myself in twitter n not to u . So shall i say that u only reply to ur frens and not to me unless i replied to urs ??:)

sometimes , i feel that the more ppl noe abt me , the more they may dislike me

so it's either that i BITE or that u stay away from me ...

beware , everyone HAHA

i nid a GC and now it isn't functioning that well :(

haix .

anyone have any idea on where i can repair it or buy a second hand for abt 50 bucks (the same price as i bought my current one) ?

:(

sighs ...

i nid it for my exams .

i nid it badly ...... .......

oh god

"your heart is the most powerful organ. It breaks, heals and becomes stronger again."

will mine heal ? maybe it will .. and i hope that it will

:)

nvm .. cher eng , u can do it de ..

must persevere ...

my faith in myself may be dwindling but i need to add more oil ...

i must face all accusations bravely .

and oso , exams are coming .

i must study hard

i cnt promise myself of acing but at least , i dun wanna let myself regret by not studying hard .

maybe i'll be used to sarcastic statements, accusations and all sort of nonsense and handle dem wid a smile nxt time .

or maybe i shld learn to be immune wid myself first so that i wun get angry wid myself , like ytd ...

sorry fortune teller for letting u down .

i guess that i'm always so slow that i nid the second time to see things clearly .

i have a bad feeling now .

am i being selfish ?

cos i dun want anyone to leave me right now .

these includes those ppl that i've been talking to .

those that i study tgt wid

the only few ppl that i confide in

and the one that i rly rly rly confide so much in

pls dun deny me of this wish ...

dear blog ,

why is that so ? could it be the words that i used ?

do u noe that i have a shock ? a bigbig shock . pls gimme a warning before that happens, okay ?

maybe i still can feel a tinge of something . or maybe im just trying my last best effort to let myself not be unfeeling . i dun want to ..

:(

from ,

sadded me

why are things the way they are now ?

i dun deny that having misunderstandings are inevitable but , i always believe that aft clearing things up or doing explanation will be fine .. isn't it ?

or am i too naive to think that this is the way out ?

i normally tend to not explain things the way that i'm rly thinking

i dislike being misunderstood so i tried explaining .

nvm .. no pt saying over here ...

seeya , blog

Why did i try explaining so much .... cnt unds why

can i stop caring as much ?

as much as i want to do so , i noe that i'm not able to accomplish that .

like wad i've told rahman , i think that it rly is 2 ...

haix .

okay , i'm fine le .

i guess that i just nid to isolate myself for awhile

i think that it's a total of 5 posts this time round :x

i'm pretty sure that u wun see but this , happy bday py :)

Yes , everything is me ... everything me jiu dui le rite . Ur words dun match ur actions . Nvm . Just blame me if u feel beta . Though i might nt feel good as a result

It is okay . I shall not do any asking this wk le . Since i always do most of the initiative and asking and suggesting . In the end , i got more blamings and complains . I shall let it be le . No pt . Seriously .

Im wondering if u r actually blaming me .

Hi blog ,
I feel so weird nw . I noe it is normal for me to feel this way but i always cnt decipjer the feeling or why i feel this way :/ hhmmmmm . im crazy le .... aiyo

It has been such a long time since i last uploaded a pic in my blog .. i'm so sorry , blog :)

i love u , blog :):) love u so much for being here for me when i needed someone to talk to ..

i will cherish u , dun wry ...

anw , i'm loving the night now .

not that i'm gng for clubbing like anyone else but , just cos that my study mood is back , strong .

listening to some music thru earpiece again and trying to study , at least do a few questions now ..

i may be tired but im not so tired that i nid slp badly nw :))

nid to cherish this study mood and at least do a few questions .

i truly hope that i can accomplish this small task set by myself .

all th best !

c++ results aint out aft 3 wks .. wad could cause the delay ? i rly hope that nth goes wrong .

omt . the guilt is kicking in AGAIN . T.T

and idk why my plurks dun show those smses to sgbeat.

twitter works fine

i went to chk the website and removed plurk acc and put it back agn but to no avail . :(