i think. i have e power to see some ppl's facade. or maybe. have e power to see if who is whose partner-to-be or current partner. oh my. tt's random.

but anw. i still think that life sucks. e more i look at some particular people, the more i think that people are all abt lies. which made me wonder if i'm a bad person. but i felt so much better to see good answers from my frens (: though i noe some are just kidding. LOL.
Back to topic. everyone is wearing a mask. it just make me feel that some ppl are just so hard to fathom. Thoughts deep down can actually be scary. sometimes, i just feel pain to think that xxx and xxx are just hypocrites but other ppl just dun seem to feel e same way as me. it's very obvious ! cnt u guys see? just wanna say "ouch" :/ call it human nature to be hypocrite? i hope not. i dun mean to keep thinking of the sad pts abt life but the facts just lie flat in front of me. i'm oblivious in e past. but now, i observe more than i speak. sometimes i'm just quiet. it's cos i'm looking at how fake some ppl can be. silent ppl are normally e more observant ones. i'm not very much into that category though. Putting those aside, i noe i have some good frens. but i just dun have e luck to be in e same cls as dem. i used to think tt my cls is a bunch of good peeps. now too. but not totally. because... ... (e uneasiness i feel towards someone while conversing wid the latter definitely goes to show something. )

no matter how much i detest the hippos in my life, i still strive to cherish wad i have. i'm a very fortunate person alr. i have ppl who love me. esp my parents. but it just ache me to think that life can actually be so complicated. and i just have to see those peeps mentioned above almost everyday during sch time. but anw, pardon me for thinking this way now. cos it's late and i tend to have emo tots in my mind when i'm tired esp at this hour. i always tried to think of the good points out of EVERYTHING bad. these includes incidents like when i'm being misunderstood. i tried to tell myself that it can be a lesson learnt or wadeva. but i just cnt bring myself forward to talk good things abt baddies. i cnt lie to myself. i just hope that people wun be this way but. if things were to go my way, it'll be called "fantasy".

but seriously, i'll try to cherish everything that i have now like i'd nvr b4. i used to let things be in the past but now, i will rly cherish my closer frens. and i rly tried my best to be in a much much much closer terms wid my current clique but... ...

anw. i'm ssoooo looking forward to meeting tofu, puppy and zheng yan ! :D:D plurk plurk! :D:D

happy bday mummy (:

ah ! here for an update !! :D
firstly, congrats me for being totally cca-less :D
not that i wanna be out. it's e situation that makes me to feel this way. and, i hope i can have all e attention on my projects. driving me mad . fyp. should i fret l8r instead?
everything is changing in this world, omg. some shocking news though.
anw. had AGM ytd. during e meeting, i think i joked wid juan and dex. LOL. i was like "juan. u wanna sit wid dex ah?" and.. "juan. u want dex sit here ah? nvm la. hl can always move to sit beside me" and LOL!.
i think it's karma. HHA ! cos he came to sit beside me -.- and JC DUN WANNA HELP ME ! *ARGH*
JC U GOOD. LOLOL!.
andand. i wanna be hooked onto "cruel temptation". it seems a nice show indeed (;

I'm here for an update agn !! :D
had been rushing projects for like 2-3 days or maybe more ! not too sure.
but one thing for sure is that, i've been slping late recently and is super tired !
but well, at least i've done projects. kinda happy for tt. it sure is far much than e other projects that i have tried my best. not rly best. LOL!
rly feeling happy for that. :D
but well. nxt wk. i'll have one presentation on monday and e other on thu ! awww. OMG. wish me luck yeah !
and good for joy ! she's having her long waited holiday ! all e best for ur results !!! see. ur name is here :P where's mine? (:
anw. meeting waiyu on monday agn !!! :D:D weeee. we can crap agn, as usual ! LOLOL
i was slping when i was asked to help. i dun mind helping seriously. cos u guys are good peeps. yes. i may be blur. but certainly NOT to e extent of TOTALLY not rmb-ing wad i've said for that day. perhaps a typo error, but i've checked my phone closely. TOTALLY DUN RECALL SAYING THAT WORD CAN. i'm not angry and certainly not trying to blow this matter up. just rly wanna say how i feel. seriously. You said u nvr look at e hp of e ppl i smsed. so how on earth can u see that stupid question as said. it's all right. BUT . u blamed me for making u guys lose. WTH !!! forget it. but i noe, i certainly wun be blur to that extent. TSK.

请积点口得

Random post. u may choose to ignore (:

wad on earth are promises when they are taken lightly and easily broken. Never ever promise anyone anything (even if that matter seems trival) if u cnt make sure that u keep e promise. wad for giving someone hope and only to dash them right before their eyes? childish on e surface and certainly inside out.
so wad is a promise? dere may be an absolute answer, but it sure is defeating the meaning if ppl are not able to fulfil them . Only do so in actions cos talk is cheap. Everyone can promise anyone anything. but not everyone can put words into actions. that is sooo ridiculous.

has anyone fulfilled their promise to me, i wonder.

sometimes, things are beta if they stay at their original position. cos no one has absolute answers to everything unpredictable.

Happiness dun come by easily as everyone dun seem to be contented wid wad they have. have u ever wondered wad u r lacking? i'm sure some do. but wad if u dun feel that u're lacking sth. (not including materistic things)? lacking nth = u having everything. ain't it? this is a quote taken from my fren anw. i agree wid it, to e max of cos.
Everyone's happiness is superficial as no one is able to see the sorrows deep down in their heart. People may spend a lifetime and years wid e other but fail to just understand them. My mum is a good example. she may noe wad i am thinking but she certainly duno how i feel. so, she ain't that powerful aft all. No one is perfect and yes , i noe that. But if certain things can be changed, so y not change for e beta? Even if u cnt achieve the result of being beta, at least try. at least show that u try.
some ppl tried to change but it is only for one moment. cos at e blink of an eye, they are back to e square one. but, not all ppl are lidat. i'm not good too. i too say abt ppl but i noe that, if i dun say out how i feel abt someone, i'll feel terrrible. However, such actions seem to be bad. to say or not to say? irony huh.
i'm still striving to change. to see e situation and decide e way of changing. may or may not achieve e outcome but at least i tried, hard.

i'm sorry for this random post cos thoughts are running randomly in my mind. just wanna say how i feel. not pointing at anyone cos this is a post in general.

WTH IS THIS MAN ! i realised tt i've been using wth recently :/

tada ! are the dolls ^ up dere cute? (;

they look much nicer in "person". nth much to blog actually. just blogged tdy for e sake of blogging. and time rly flies. very fast. it's sunday tdy. it's sunday. tmr is monday and that means e strt of another hectic wk. as usual. i dread projects. i just have an unspeakable feeling and fear when looking for a grp. idk wad's that abt.

anw. a random conv btwn my parents and i goes like this:

father: nxt time, i'll buy e fruits.

mum: it's okay. i buy it. cos i dun wanna trouble u this 'lao ren jia' (old ppl) *in a joking manner*

me: daddy ! mum may sound nice in this. but wad she rly meant to say is that , u are old *:P*

den 'LOLs' filled e air. and my mum claims that i bully her :P LOL. if my family dun joke for one day, it'll be super weird. but this dun apply to all family. cos i noe, dere are some families totally different from mine.

(still contented wid wad i have. striving to cherish everything)

went home tdy and unexpectedly saw wayne. it's been soooo long since i last saw my tkd mates.
we talked a lot. mostly abt sch stuffs esp tkd !
he was like telling me abt e toughness of the trng now. i was like telling him. "even if e trng aint tt tough and i went back, i wun be able to tk it"
and since i'm green. tsk, e lvl of difficulty will rise tremendously.
but esp juan. brown tip leh. ! and i heard tt u can split. :P *claps claps*
i think i'll need to tk back e saying that i'll go back for one trng nxt yr :X
*aaahhhh* i miss my mates ): but not xxx and xxx and xxx and xxx.

i dun care wadeva sad things tt happened in e past. i tk back all e sadness that i've said regarding anyone. cos wad i noe now is, i'm truly contented wid my life. this level of being noticed is good enough. dun expect more. and e love i've received. v contented alr (:
i'm not unhappy abt anything now. cos, everything seems perfect now. but i noe, it wun last.

wanted to blog abt some stuffs. but was so engrossed in plurk since i'm back home.
and aft bro used my comp.
e number of unread responses shot up.
it's a lot man. i should get on wid my project as determined !!!!
doubt i'll be able to do tt. *oops*

random:
only the person that u love the most can hurt you the most.
i'm like being happy in sch these 2 days. can it stay like this forever?
that will be a wishful thinking on my part :/
nth is perfect in this world.
and i'm still constantly being paranoid over everthing !
i'm just being afraid that e persons that i love e dearest would no longer love me and leave me.
and.. wad if dere is no one out dere caring for me.
i noe, these thoughts are redundant. but, many things happened in e past. i cnt help feeling paranoid.
i cnt help it.
though i noe, often, these thoughts are useless. i have goodie frens. i have besties.
stop being lidat, will u. dun be paranoid !

9月8日出生的人如跡一般，總是很難令人瞭解他們心中想些什麼。其實，在他們的心底，最感興趣的是把所有事情整理得有條不紊、做事乾脆。一般而言，改善家庭、社交或甚至全國性團體的處境是他們最想做的事。然而，當他們走錯路時卻仍會認為自己的行為是合理或負責任的。總而言之，不管一切努力到最後的結果是好是壞，不容置疑的是，9月8日出生的人會對他們週遭環境帶來相當大的衝擊。
通常，出生於這一天的人都會遭受他人的誤解，最主要的原因是他們太神秘了，同時，他們還可借由所扮演的角色，成為某團體或生活模式的代言人甚至象徵。他們是生活舞台中卓越的演員，能夠扮演各種角色，但或許就如馬庫士.奧略流斯(Marcus Aurelius)在《沉思錄》一書中所建議的，通常，我們只要能將其中一項扮演好就該覺得滿意了。
絕大部分在9月8日出生的人，都是以﹝非黑即白﹞的眼光來看待這個世界，認為凡事都受制於善與惡這兩股勢力當中；而且他們自己所選擇的角色，經常都信念的保護者，以對抗家庭、國家、黨派或教會的敵人。然而很諷刺的是，他們自己經常就是信念或原則的敵人！因此，這些出生於9月8日的人，就必須多花一點時間來審視自己的價值觀是否如他們所想像般純潔，這對他們來說是件極為重要的工作。由交付給他們的重責大任中，他們可看清自己行動的真正本質或動機，並且對自己的需求所產生的保持高度的警覺。
9月8日出生的人通常都能借由純熟的角色扮演、幽默感以及嚴肅感，而使別人聽命於他們。的確，很少有人會無視於他們的存在，許多出生於這一天的人都能贏得他人相當的敬重，極少數的幾位還會贏得崇拜，但也有一些會讓人心生畏懼。如果把他們擺在父母、配偶或情人的位置上，不同的角色扮演很可能就會對他們產生極大的挑戰性。也許他們會令人難以置信地專橫、頑固，甚至變成一個暴君，但他們也是十分顧家與值得信賴的。他們那一大堆令人困惑的矛盾，往往也吸引著和他們交往的人。
不管於公或於私，9月8日出生的人都非常想成為團體中的領袖，政治對他們格外有吸引力。就算他們不在社會性事務中積極扮演領導者的角色，也會對當代深具重要性的議題表現出莫大的興趣，而他們對這些事情的觀點，並不會顯出特別具有包容性。最常見的情況是，他們比較樂於維持現狀，並且反對任何顧慮不擊或他們認為會導致傷害的各種改變。這些出生於9月8日的人並不十分好相處，不過，他們並不依賴他人的見解來行事，反而會緊緊守自己的道路，並且衷心認為自己所做的一切都是為了全體的最高利益。
幸運數字和守護星
9月8日出生的人會受到數字8和土星的影響。由於土星代表的是責任與節制、謹慎與宿命，所以，9月8日出生的人個性上保守的一面就會特別突顯。土星與水星（處女座的主宰行星）的交會，會為出生於今天的人帶來演講與思考方面特別優秀的能力。而受數字8影響的人通常會緩慢而謹慎地建立起自己的生活與事業。他們有顆熱忱的心，但由於土星的影響，使得他們看起來總讓人覺得比較不苟言笑或難以親近，實際上，他們是外冷內熱型的人。
健康
一般說來，9月8日出生的人都滿固執的，很難被旁人說服，而且對於自己的健康問題都有一套相當執著的看法。所以，若真的發現什麼疾病，他們的驢子脾氣要負最大的責任。雖然他們認為週遭的人的思想必須得到淨化，可是卻從未將同樣的標準套用在自己的飲食習慣與生活形態上。由於他們比較容易緊張，所以必須防範一些心臟血管方面的疾病，以及注意自己的飲食習慣，剔除掉飲食中會危害到健康的東西。試著尋求性生活上的節制與溫情，情感上的穩定關係，對於出生於今天的人來說也是極為重要的。
建議
你的觀念不一定始終能讓別人輕易地接受，不要對別人太過苛求，給他們一點時間，讓他們能稍微喘息一下。努力做自己，也不要讓自己變得太過頤指氣使或感覺遲鈍。
名人
彼得謝勒(Peter Sellers)英國喜劇電影演員，創造了電影史上最有名的喜劇角色之一﹝粉紅豹﹞，他還帶領原班人馬演出六部粉紅豹系列影片。
台灣導演侯孝賢，以《悲情城市》獲得威尼斯國際影展最佳影片金獅獎，成為世界性知名導演。
外號﹝獅心﹞的英王理查一世(Richard)，參加十字軍東征，結果被奧匈帝國國王囚禁了出眾年之久，後來英國人以贖金將他贖回，並重新取回王權。
南非政治人物維活德(Hendrick Frensch Verwoerd)種族隔離政策的創始人。
巴洛特(Jean-Louis Barrault)法國舞台劇與電影演員，也是導演與全國劇院總監。由他詮釋的最著名角色是在影片《天國的子女們》中，模仿19世紀啞劇演員德布芮，演出惟妙惟肖。
19世紀捷克作曲家德弗札克(Antonin Dvorak)，以《新世界交響曲》知名，其作品有偉大的抒懷內涵、絕佳的編曲和動人的節奏。
塔羅牌
大秘儀塔羅牌的第8張代表﹝力量﹞，圖片中畫著一位優雅的皇后，正在馴服一頭憤怒的獅子。皇后象徵女魔法師，可以駕馭不易控制的能量，並代表道德及體能上的優越力量。牌面正立時，這張牌代表個人的魅力以及追求成功的決心；牌面倒立時，則是自滿和濫權。
靜思語
﹝生活中的大部分都屬於灰色地帶。﹞許多事情是很難用二分法加以論斷的。
優點
認真、活力充沛、追求表現。
缺點
頑固、權威主義、容易被誤導。

ytd is a super happy day for me :D
haha. hmmm..
and that made me waking up feeling so happy.
but fell into sadness aft that when i recalled my bad dream.
it's a dream abt my cls.
a bad dream. call it insecure, or wad? even ah bao dun wanna talk to me.
in reality, i'm just a redundant 5th person in e grp. even if Ray joins us them, he fitted into e position and me, being e redundant 6th person. but well, being insecure is being me. i'm used to it.