dear blog ..

dear blog !!

dear blog :)

dear blog :(

haix :(

bye blog ...

byebyebyebyebye

why issit that i find everything scary and weird now ..

people, issues , past, present

i feel myself in an irony now ...

i nid distractions but i cnt afford to be distracted and i'm here distracting myself by blogging ..

haha . "bravo" , cher eng ....

good job :)

i shldnt be feeling anything ...

thinking positively , it might be sth good ...

thinking negatively, more sadness might come along agn

hi blog ,

u have 555 posts and 14555 views in total

i knew it . i forgot to watch the recorded lectures ..

and i actually forgot that i've blogged abt gng to listen to the lecture and deleted it ...

lol.

i had been procrastinating ...... i nid to start hearing the recorded lectures asap !

was too focused in doing my phy tb questions alr .

HAHA i just nid reminders ...

guess that i nid reminders in almost everything i do or think ...

alamak

*smackshead*

maybe i shall commence it at 9pm .

(hopefully that i wun forget) ....

off to do my chapter 11 now :))

hi blog

bye blog

i've nvr have this feeling so strong before .

pls dun lemme have anymore nightmares alr .

if trying to clear misunderstandings by explaining is equivalent to finding excuses for things that ppl do , den it is beta to not explain nor say anything , isn't it ?

and if this happens , misunderstandings arise . so , it is beta for misunderstandings to occur ?

and music is my best companion tdy :)

to kip me out of distractions :D

but prob is , most of the songs in my list are emo ones .

though they are nice to listen to , my mind tend to wander off to alot of things ..

random ones and i cnt rmb wad are they now . HAHA .

bravo

all i nid is just one person whom i can talk alot of things freely to .

but i seldom feel comfortable wid ppl to tell dem alot of things .

i do tell ppl things but not alot . just abit here and dere ..

and i feel so happy singing now . :))

i want to go kbox !

but idk who is okay singing chinese songs wid me .

lazy to find ppl . :x

i think that my heart rly is numb wid u

cos i dun feel anything now .

just like wad i told someone previously .

:) it is a good thing i guess ...

this made me no longer feel so bothered by those childish acts of urs .

i noe wad i can do to make things be beta bt it cant be done most of the times due to many constraints .

this is where understanding comes into place .

i just dun want this "feeling" to tk over my whole heart such that i'd feel numb in everything ...

sth that i'd nvr say :))

*mediating* HAHA

why do i feel so weird ? lol .

(not talking abt anyone whom u wld guess)

it's someone whom u cant guess (i think)

trying to observe alot of ppl .

but sometimes when i look at dem , i tend to stare into space wid my glare on dem . lol !

my mind wanders off or just shut off cos i'm tired .

well , aft tdy , i realized that i can actually dun feel bu she de .

maybe i will if it really happens but , for now , i dun think i will .

the more bad i see in someone , the more i will feel numb .

it isn't worth having the 10th time to happen and so it didnt happen aft all i guess .

when i see certain comments now , i will go "i expected it . wad else can i do ? i've rly tried all the things tht i can .. u said that u will blame urself first when things happen but i dun see u reflecting on ur own actions . idk wad i've done are right but at least, i've tried my best and tried my best to let have anymore rooms for regrets . at least, i'm trying hard . i noe u r trying hard too ... trying hard to complain .... .... .... "

like i told my fren "i will consider if he tries changing his racism and temper but i rly doubt that he will" .. mcp will hardly change ...

i'm a crazily weird person cos i can actually wanna laugh when i see u being so unreasonable or immature.

miscalculated my waking up time and ended up 30 mins earlier in sch . slept for ard 20 mins while waiting for frens to arrive before doing work at forum . that place is quite conducive except for the stuffy smell inside . i suck at chap 8 . need to redo it maybe tmr :) shall do chap 9 now .. (after my forensic heroes) HAHA . i rly rly rly love that show and it rly made me feel more interested in forensic science . the scenes like the gun shot paths and the heated superglue rly reminds me of my lecture :))

and i'm actually motivated by "forensic heroes" and forensic science ... :p