i guess, this will be e last time i'm blogging abt u here.
though frens for some time, i realised tt i have nvr really read ur blog closely. today is e first time. wad a fren i am. news were everything. and i guessed all my frens would have known abt it alr. i miss u dearly. i rmbed we gng to e chalet. and u love my cls a lot. u shared ur secrets to me. and they are still safe in my heart. i teared for someone whom i find weird, ironically. but nevertheless, u r still my gd fren. would u pls come back?
y are those china ppl so cruel. ? since this is a private blog, i'm more able to blog abt this slightly more freely. i dun wanna "publicy" abt this matter more. u're forever my good fren. i still rmb u being poor @ ur etech. and cos of tt, u entered our cls for one sem.
misses. loads. maybe u'll find a better place.

i'm currently having a lot of random thoughts, still, seriously.
i still cnt let go of my fren.
this world has gt a lot of weird people.
we cannot pacify every ppl. cos we, ourselves are an individual being.
there is no such thing as forever.
i'm so tired of everything.

人算不如天算.
a fren and i'm lidat. cnt imagine his family members. or even my close ones :/

life is so vulnerable. we should rly cherish our close ones.
seriously.
R.I.P. :/

awww.
i think working and wking up on a nice nice saturday dun seem to be curing me of my blur-ness !
i forgot to bring my water bottle and log book. HAIX !! and now stomache :(

yoyo !
changed comp alr. (workplace). so sian can. cos this comp is so laggy . plus, i've alr gotten use to the previous comp le. haix :/
and this comp kept typo error. LOL.
and omg. juan gt 3.9 !!
crazy ! hahaha.. congrats :P

BUTBUT. I'M SO COLD NOW ! *BRRR*

If i tk e earlier bus, i'll see one chio bu. LOL. and if i tk e later bus, i'll see e man wid his child + one maid and a gal tt looks like LK's fren.
haha. okay. this's random.

awww. tt's a ncie change in u. will it stay? (;

haha !
saw my results but duno gpa yet..
gt a shock of my life to see one stupid results. but it's gems.
LOL.
didnt study for tt. so, getting tt results is an all right for me :X
and omg, y is ur gpa always so high !
stan, gimme ur gpa la :P

glad tt u said u care (:

it's lunch time now !
and it's super cold ! *brrr*
i still feel e chill even aft gulping down hot milo and wrapping myself in sweater.
):
had been sneezing a lot a lot of times tdy
awww. just not being myself agn :(

tada ! this is e place which i went for my buffet ytd wid family ((:

personally, i wished i have not gone dere. e food dere are kinda simple. like crab, prawns (which i seldom eat), sushi, soup, fried rice, ice cream, cake and so on. i mean, i dun normally eat such stuffs. haha !

but well, it's good experience cos i seldom have a get tgt dinner !

stop being emo rte?
yes i noe. but i simply cant put words into actions.
cos i just noe, it's simply too hard to.
but anw, i'm gng out l8r. wid family aft for like such a long period of times.
yay. so happy.

i wanna pour everything out. it's been in my heart for like kinda some time. but idk y i dun and stop myself from telling anyone everything. why? sometimes, i'd stop and think of e times and wad u said to me. i would rly wanna believe them a lot but i doubt i can now cos ur actions show likewise. i wanted to live in self denial so much but i doubt that would make me live in a good scenerio. sometimes, i stop and help u to give me so many reasons for e neglect that my heart just ache so much. no much of any consoling would do a good job in cheering me up. and if they do, it's only for a split second.

i should have gotten to china for oitp , so i wld not have to tolerate this sadness. but i didn't . u're part of e few reasons to y i stayed. do u noe? no, u dun. and it's all right. dun blame you.

i'm blaming no one now. it just dun feel right to tell anyone everything of wad i'm feeling now. though u can sense e sadness for urself. frens come and console me, making me rly happy and consoled. but like i said, no much of consoling would do a gd job. cos they ain't e right medication.

i hadn't been myself these few days. i stone . i stare into space. i've been doin wrong things. my daily routine are all screwed up.i dun smile. and if i do, it's just to make ppl from worrying abt me. just not being myself. i wanted so much for any reassurance. even it means lying to me. i'd be contented. at least, show tt u care.

but i noe, u wun be seeing this post. gals need actions, reassurances. okay, but at least for me. i'm so in need of them. i'm easily contented.
but wad do u show? i dun see any reason for someone to reply things that slowly.
yes, u wouldn't see this. u wouldn't care. wad for i blog abt this?
u wun at least show that u care. it would not change anything.
just wad happened? at least, i'm worried for u.
i've been saying this over and over agn. till i'm so tired of it.

i tried to held back crying during work

working on a good saturday morning.
my blog is so dull, no pics !
gotta find something to upload soon ((:
doubt more than 5 ppl will read my blog.
not more than 3 will read.

为何生活上不愉快的事情那么多。为何我永远都为同一件事而伤心，难过。
好想崩溃。我不喜欢别人逼我做我不喜欢的事。好难过。:/

you're e only one who can affect my mood SO MUCH.
everytime my hp ring, i wld think tt it's u.
but to disappointment most of e times.
yes, u mean a lot to me, and i missed u dearly.
i dun wanna emo anymore.

this is a post of feelings tt i got from vincent's post.


i agree that life is unpredictable and i noe tt most ppl will agree wid this too.
and u mentioned abt love. yes, a lot of e ppl duno wad's love . and, love is cruel, indeed.
dere will bound to be one party being hurt and it dun last.
bt even so, dere are still couples tgt wid each other even in their eighties and nineties. that can be said to be e minorities wid e high rates of divorce cases.
but well, as far as i noe, if u're willing to put in e effort (but of cos, both parties), love can be maintained and can last long.
all ppl crave for love, so tt's why they still wanna to go into one even if they think/ noe they'll be hurt. being in love gives us an unexplanable feeling and we'll want to do a lot of things for e other party. but of cos, dere are bound to be ppl who toy ard wid other's feelings and inflict pain and hurt in dem.

Broken promises, is one of e things tt u've mentioned. yeah, ppl do break promises tt they've made. i'm one of e victims of such liers. agree wid wad u've said too. dun make promises if u noe u cnt do it. i've nth much to say abt this alr. cos i noe, i'm kinda numb wid this topic. pain inflicted and forgotten alr. no point thinking and harping over it. yeah?

vincent, i noe tt u r sick n tired of life, but hey, this is life, ain't it? if dere ain't so many ups and downs, wun it be borin? though i noe tt no one would want to have so many downs in ur life. if fate comes, you'll be tgt wid ur another half. no point fretting so much abt love and just remain happy. if ppl look @ e looks, it mean he/she ain't worth it and i've mentioned this to u b4. so, wad's e point of being bothered by them, rte? i noe, e decision lies wid u if u wanna cheer up or be happy. i oso duno wad i wanna say alr. so, cheer up , my good fren !

it's currently e lunch time. hence, another post here ((:
so far so good yeah :D
came back from changi village hotel not long ago only for e testing. kinda cool. (;
had a nice nice lunch .
and enjoying e slience in e car. surprisingly, i dun like to talk while sitting in e car/ bus.
cos if i talk a lot, i'll get a worse bus sickness which cause great discomfort to my body.
and seriously, i think tt zy is rly a gentleman.

sometimes, i feel tt e holiday ain't rly a holiday. yes, apart from work (which is a must), i dun get to see u often. i understand, but sadly, it's a total different case from being sad. :/

everything is past, ain't it?
i cnt believe tt i could actually get emo ytd during work, wid those words of messages ringing in my ear . i drifted apart from work and stared into space. tt's actually fine cos i've finished my part of work and no work for me atm. some free time for me to relax but i just emoed. haix. u told me abt e past. i just cnt help but tot abt them. it's all in e past alr :/ past.

I think dere's sth wrong wid my phone.
it lagged and messages sent e previous night were only received this morn ! :/
haix haix. no wonder my phone is so quiet. adnormally quiet ! so not used to it. HAHA !
*awww* i think i'll be learning new things tdy. having a slight free time now. so decided to blog. since it wun take up much time ! :P
and dinosaur, enjoy ur ns :P

CHANGE !!!!
and finally blogger at this comp is working fine !

HAPPY BDAY ELLIN and sylvia !
wanted to wish them earlier de. but had been busy and forgotten abt it :X
awww. i'm still missing my frens loads !
and finally met u ytd (:

WARNING : this may be a long post ! ( i think )

.

dere's this alumni event gng ard in sch for SMAE students -- graduants. talk was given by 2 different ppl on 2 different topic. i simply LOVE e first speaker. her presentation roxs !

P.S. these info are updated to e best of my memory. enjoy reading ! :D

Firstly, she asked us to sit down on a chair, leaning back. (p.s. u may try too if u want !)
Next, lift up ur right leg and turn ur ankle in a clockwise direction. make sure it's lifted up from e ground !
Raise ur right hand and write e number 6 (in e air) while ur right ankle is rotating.
when we started to do this action, we all laughed. LOL.

She mentioned 3 types of anger style tt ppl have.
1st: Ignoring type. (ignore e things tt make u angry)
2nd: Venting out ur anger. ( can be in terms of throwing things or shouting)
3rd: calming type. (try to solve probs in a calm manner)

As for e elaborated terms for each of them, i've forgotten. LOL.

What will make u feel loved e most?

Firstly, think carefully!

- You feel loved most when people spend quality time wid u and talk to u. (it can be in terms of having a meal tgt and have a talk)

- You feel loved most when people gives u gifts and notes. ( It can be in a form of little gifts which ain't expensive. It dun need to be expensive necklace)

- You feel loved most when people gives u words of afirmation. e.g. " Great job !", "keep up the good work! "

- You feel loved most when people help u to do things. (e.g. helping you to carry ur books or helping you to move hse)

- You feel loved most when ppl gives u a hug or a pat at e back.

wad kind of person are u? which do u feel most loved? think before looking down ! (:



If u choose e first one, u are e quality time (type) person. You want ur frens/ ur another half to have undivided attention to you and only you, to go out tgt to have a meal.

If you choose e second one, u r e receving gifts (type) person. It gives u e love feeling when u see little little things tt he/she has done for u.

If you choose e third one, u r e words of affirmation (type) person. You will need to hear ur fren/ ur another half telling u tt he/ she loves u. if he dun do so, it means tt he/she dun love u no matter how much things e former has done for u.

If you choose e fourth one, u r e acts of service (type) person. You need ur frens/ ur another half to do things for u and it can be in e form of little little things.

And if u choose e last one, you are the physical touch (type) person. And a hug is all u need !



Different ppl have different ways of feeling loved. You wun/ may not feel loved if ur frens/ another half do things tt they will feel loved, to u. For example, a fren of urs may do a lot of things for u but u dun feel loved. You longed for a hug to feel loved.
So , perhaps u wld want to noe ur frens/ another half beta to feel wad kind of person they are to feel loved and do tt manner to express ur love for him/her/ them.

e second speaker's presentation is boring though and i felt like slping. thus, i can update nth abt tt LOL.

p.s. 请你不要再模仿我了，好吗？ 很烦!

:/

I dreamt abt fanny, see mun, ellin and cecilia (surprisingly, cos i seldom talk to her)
guess i miss them a lot :/
and i miss u more. how? :(

dere's seriously probs updating my blog at this company. this comp. LOL!.
so looking forward to lunch time. cos i'm HUNGRY ! haha.

sometimes.. i rly dislike myself :/ i noe, all ppl make mistakes.

i can finally blog at home at my own pace now :D
haha ! wanted to blog in e office but dere's sth wrong wid e comp. i cnt update blog successfully. Mr Lim came to see us tdy. and i told him sth abt our toilet.
and dere i told them abt this incident of this toilet and he and zy laughed at me :/ LOL!
.. . .... ...
" i rmbed e first time i entered e toilet and i tried to close e door but it cnt seem to close. so i tot tt e door aint supposed to be closed. so i went in and didn't close e door".
.. . .... ...
den Mr Lim's fren showed mr lim ard e office.
Mr Lim : i heard tt e toilet's door is v difficult to close
Mr Tan (Ah Lim's fren) : Once u close it, u cnt open.

den me and zy went LOL.


Currently talking to seemun now and i decided to come and edit my post agn. cos, i told her tt my colleagues are vvv nice.
and yeah, they are v nice, funny and they dun have those kind of "Boss- workers" relationships. in another words, all e ppl working dere are only termed as frens (even if they are of higher rank). This is not something common in outside work.
At first, i felt so tired working only paper work cos i have to stare at e comp for a long period of time. but did filing tdy and dun feel tt tired, surprisingly. it could be because i didn't use e comp during filing. Basically e tasks now are easy. i wanna finish my this part of job fast so tt i can learn more of other things. CP is waiting for me ! haha. tt's my aim for now. and i dun care if i'm overworking and underpaid alr. cos, i wanna learn during this 6 wks. esp when those peeps are v nice dere. though, i noe. i will be SUPER TIRED.

Just back from lunch ! haha! actually, i planned to stay in e office but was forced to meal tgt wid dem. LOL.we went to paya lebar (i think). I dun regret gng out wid dem in e end as they are a bunch of funny peeps ! one of my colleagues lost in a betting game and had to drink "lei cha". I was forced to try one mouthful and i felt like vomitting alr. LOL. e taste is like so awful ! :/ (no offence) *haha*
Mr Lim's fren asked me "it taste like drain water rte?"

sometimes, ppl will come and provoke u when u didn't do anything to dem. why?

sometimes, ppl who are aquainted to u for a long time dun rly understand u. why?

sometimes, I find it easier to pour things out to ppl whom i've nvr seen b4 rather than those whom i'm close wid. why?

sometimes, when i'm in need of ppl to sms or talk to, those ppl whom i've nvr/ rarely see, reply me faster. keeping my companion. why?

sometimes, i like to keep things to myself. why?

sometimes, i dun dare to say how i feel to ppl closer to me. for fear of them not supporting me. why?

sometimes, i longed to pour our my unhappiness but held back at e last moment. why?

sometimes, i hinted and even said some things, things are still e same. why?

sometimes, i can feel emo when i'm actually happy. why?

sometimes, even me, myself cnt cheer me up. why?

why are dere so many "why's"?

i duno :/ i only noe, i'm beat now. didnt have a good night slp ytd.

emo.

waiting for ur reply. but it seems so long. who shall i turn to now?

Doing keying of data tdy. nth much i guess. haha ! but it's kinda tedous to find e numbers and dates. but overall is okay. currently still workng and e guy nxt to me is playing mafia war. LOL. zheng yang didn't come tdy. haix. he should come ! LOL. den at least someone can help to distribute e workload :P my collegues drove out to have lunch tdy. way before 12, i'm alr starting to feel my stomach growling. it wun happen in sch but i duno y it is so hungry when i'm working :/ as e car drove, it went circles, like spirals down e pathway and my head spinned :/ giddiness hit me heavily esp when i'm so hungry ): aft lunch, i felt sososososooooo tired ! looking at e numbers, e huge pile of papers made my life dull. *aww* i shouldn't complain so much ! i was like complaining and complaining to vincent and zhengyang and freddy ! luckily they replied me fast. if not, i rly cnt imagine my life :X all right all right ! no more grumbling. :/ butbut, tmr will sure be a beta day. cos zy is coming alr ! at least someone to talk to me. HAHA! he was like saying, i say e workload until he dun feel like coming alr. haha ! den i immediately changed my attitude towards e work and replied " this work is so good ! only e keying in of datas. " I had to take bus to and fro e workplace and i seriously hate sitting on e bus. when i'm born till now, i will feel super giddy when i'm on e bus. but at least, beta than last time

caught "G force" tdy and it's kinda funny !
i love every hamsters, including e mole and guinea pigs. Most importantly, i LOVE e 3 little hamsters ! they are like speaking e same words simultaneously ! cute cute !! ((:

nxt up is e cycling type at ecp.i took one pic of e beach but cnt upload to blogger now. hp is charging ! had to charge it cos tmr is e itp. ! omg.
i still haven't rly enjoyed my holiday and itp is here. will be leaving hse at 7 tmr. or maybe earlier. i'm so tired now. wonder wad will happen tmr ! plus, my butt rly hurts , a lot ! haha ! hadn't been cycling for so long in such a long long period of time. *ouch* )':

p.s. i dun love stanley ! i love yao liang. hahah ! cancan? LOL!

i'm currently feeling so bored. bored to tears.
finished watching one show and is still so bored ! wanna watch another show but ain't in e mood to. haix. wad to do? but only i noe why i'm so moodless. haha. exams finally ended but right aft it is itp. that's e bad thing. e good thing is that e faster e attachment ends, e beta. aint it?
of cos it is.

HAHA!
i suddenly rmb tt i have not come to view my blog, and e moment i came in, i saw so many tags!
kinda touched leh ! :P
i will try to blog more often . try
haha. itp will be coming soon. hope i can survive dere. but seriously, i still think mr lim is a good tcher . just tt e way he teach, i cnt catch up most of e time .
gosh. and omg. i'm starting to miss my course mates le.
)':

All right, this shall be my new blog (:

i think i still love and miss blogging .

some of u may be thinking e reason behind why i suddenly delete my previous blog.

e reason is just mainly due to e fact of too little time to blog.

and, most imptly, e sudden increase of stalkers.

frens i dun mind. but it's just that too much.

i cnt seem to find tt much frens who will read my blog in just one day.

but well, enough of that. !
exams are finally over ! :D

freedom rte!? but, attachment is here.

straight after exams. *aww*

but at least, i have e weekend to go out !.

short post for e day (:

P.S. i love e sweater. thanks ! :D