i'm super exhausted.

sooooo envious when i saw my fren comment that she's so free and nth to do for her fyp ):

cos it's like, i'm slogging my guts out for fyp and she's slacking like abc over dere ):

how i wish i were in her grp. so i can slack too?

but wait...nope. i'd still rather be in my current grp.

at least they're trying v hard to do their things.

i need a long long rest.

but i'm so prepared to end my fyp at 10 PM tmr.

yes. from 9.30 am.

or maybe.. 9 am.

super exhausted.

super shag.

monday's interview will be a kinda small one i guess. 10%

but... still, it's 10 marks.

kinda a high score too.

i wanna slp soon.

bt i cnt.

i needa do some housework too.

but, clothes are still vvvv wet. ):

i cnt do any.

went to slp at 8 ytd.

was super tired that i fell asleep the moment i close my eyes.

and yet, i had to be woken up at 10.30

to see 3 smses and 2 missed calls.

it's like..hey, if i see ur sms and weren't busy,

i'll SURE reply rte?

i didn't reply.

and dere'll be 2 possibility.

busy or asleep.

or maybe even.. didnt check hp.

although being busy has a higher possibility,

you cnt rule out the fact that i'm asleep.

i seriously.. seriously dun understand why u have to call me twice for sth so minor.

it's not like u have to get the answer NOW rite?

plus, no matter how busy i am, or even asleep,

i'd still see ur sms at the end of the day.

unless i saw ur sms and forget to reply, which is possible.

you can still sms me like during afternoon, the nxt day ):

kk fine. maybe i shouldn't even get annoyed for being woken up.

:/

but... i was rly feeling so irritated ytd.

tried to slp.. but cnt.

aft 30mins of tossing ard in bed.

i got up to walk ard the hse and went back to slp.

my mind was super active den.

before wking up, i didnt have a nice and calm slp, to be frank.

but when i was woken up,

my mind was full of grievance, those bad memories of u kept flashing past.

i felt so tired and rly felt like crying but i didnt.

it's like, the past is haunting aft me agn.

so i tried vvv hard to clear my mind and concentrate on slping

but aft 2 hrs, i still cnt slp.

):

and finally, i fell asleep at nearing one am.

what a night.

Sometimes, i'm rly confused.

super confused.

wheneva i see ur effort,

my mind just cnt stop thinking of how bad u were to me last time.

i seriously shouldn't give u chancesssss back den.

i duno why i were still so hopeful.

how silly.

:/

but well,

now when u rly did try..

i just felt that..

you did all these, just cos u felt it's a waste.

maybe, it's cos of other "romantic" reasons but..

i truly, seriously, really felt that..

was u're doing now,

are cos you felt that it's a waste to end things that way,

after 1 yr ++

and.. i'm constantly worrying that u'll shoot ur mouth off,

and saying things, that were so untrue.

so, so unreal.

i seriously cnt stand ur attitude of saying that i felt and even saying things

when i DIDNT.

it happened b4 and the things that u said, regarding wad i said and even feel,

are actually what YOU are feeling and saying.

it's super... "dots"

i noe, u have ur redeeming points too.

and i always, constantly tell myself abt e gd points you have.

but i always failed.

cos, wheneva i tried doing that,

you did sth negative.

sometimes, the reasons, or even excuses that u told me..

are SUPER SUPER CRAP.

i think i should call myself stupid..

to deceive myself into believing u.

though i noe, they are rly craps.

i'm truly very tired.

exhausted.

shagged.

and whatever pool of vocabulary that u can find